Are you at war with your body? Do you use food or exercise to seek control? Do you dream of a life of purpose beyond worrying about your size and shape?
Ally Rae Pesta's vignette-style memoir shows the inner workings of a young woman's mind as she becomes obsessed with "healthy" eating, exercise, and being exceptional. Throughout adolescence, Ally vacillates between feeling too much and never enough in a culture that always demands more. After experiencing sexual assault in her teens, Ally feels her body is not her own.
As people validate Ally for her athletic drive and shrinking figure, she plummets deeper into an eating disorder, convinced she's the "epitome of health." Monitoring food and exercising to exhaustion becomes Ally's attempt at control. At seventeen, doctors diagnose her with anorexia, orthorexia, and exercise addiction, forcing Ally to face the harrowing reality that her disorder is threatening her life.
Ally tells an authentically raw story about her ongoing healing journey, showing how treatment has enabled her to accept support, create community, build a healthy relationship with movement, and enjoy food.
For any individuals, family members, or friends on a similar journey, this frank memoir provides hope for overcoming trauma and achieving hard-earned self-love.
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At seventeen, Ally Rae Pesta was diagnosed with a complex eating disorder. She has been in recovery for over ten years. Raised in Cleveland, Ohio, Ally now lives in Denver, Colorado, where she works as an Eating Disorder Recovery Coach, a 200-HR Certified Yoga Teacher, and a Certified Run Coach. Ally is also a sexual assault survivor who empowers others to reclaim freedom and power over their body in a loving, worthy, and healing way.
From personal and professional experience, Ally knows how to use joyful movement to aid and support herself and others in their recovery journey. She has swum ten miles from one end of Cleveland to the other, taught yoga in juvenile delinquent centers, run marathons, and serves as a leader of disability communities. Now, instead of compulsively exercising, Ally celebrates what her body can do, teaching others to embrace the freedom to move, enjoy food, and live a large, fulfilling, and meaningful life of purpose beyond their body.
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