Every child is born to be a blessing. Many parents experience overwhelming love when their children are born, and strive to raise their children to experience a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. This guide for parents enables them study, learn, and grow together to find answers to shared questions and concerns as they raise their children. Parents will deal with many areas of children's lives such as self-control, truth-telling, sibling rivalry, generosity, and making faithful decisions. Perfect for small groups, each session includes Scripture, plus stories, and questions for meditation and discussion. Parents learn new tools to respond to their children in positive, Christ-like ways, and gives them the courage to face one of the most blessed jobs of all -- raising Christian children.
Born to Be a Blessing
A Parent's Guide to Raising Christian ChildrenBy Myrtle FelknerAbingdon Press
Copyright © 2009 The United Methodist Publishing House
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4267-0676-9Contents
Foreword..........................................................7Introduction......................................................9Part One: Fall, Turning Leaves....................................11Part Two: Winter, Falling Snow....................................50Part Three: Spring and Summer, Greening Trees.....................85
Chapter One
The Diplomatic Coffee Can Bible Reading: Ephesians 6:1-4
I paused hesitantly at the door of the Klubhouse. My eleven-year-old hosts lent a hand as I climbed over the twisted limb of an old pear tree and entered their castle. Here at the tree-stump table, seated on tree-stump chairs, we enjoyed soft drinks while the boys pointed out such unique features as the upstairs recliner, the air-raid shelter, the mailbox, even a doorbell (a can of rocks—very effective). This spacious Klubhouse extended over part of an abandoned orchard, whose twisted or fallen apple and pear trees offered terrific possibilities. The boys built with salvaged tin and lumber, fashioning a retreat to warm the heart of even a grandmother.
I suppose it was the air-raid shelter, whose roof was a discarded chick brooder, that stimulated my thinking. Obviously, these fellows were living in response to world events. I gave them a flag to fly over the air-raid shelter, and I ventured the opinion that there would be mail in the mailbox before too long. In an envelope marked "Diplomatic MAIL. Open at ONCE," I enclosed the following note: "I have had word that the King of Slobovia is planning to capture your flag and occupy the Klubhouse. I am willing to negotiate the peace between the Klubhouse and Slobovia."
The kids and I had often played these games. My expectation was that I would be appointed ambassador or UN Peacemaker at the very least. To my surprise, the message that appeared in my own mailbox was a terse, "Bring 'em on." When I checked with the boys, they assured me that they had stored up an ample supply of ammunition—green peas, walnuts, and hedge apples. Any Slobs who tried to capture the flag could be easily resisted.
Enter the Diplomatic Coffee Can. Two chocolate bars accompanied an official request from the Slobs to build their own capitol at the far end of the orchard. Would chocolate bars be considered adequate rent? I placed the Diplomatic Coffee Can in their mailbox and waited an anxious week for a reply. As of now, we are still negotiating; and I am cautiously hopeful.
* * *
Imaginative games are nothing new to our children and grandchildren. We have delightful memories of sandbox castles being stormed by Sir Knight on his trusted tractor. We have turned the family room into a multicultural village. An igloo of sheets is Alaska, complete with polar bear stuffed toys; Africa is under the table, where we confine the tigers and lions; India is in the far corner, with a music box and elephants and monkeys.
Parents and other adults who play with children, structured play as well as imaginative games, will quickly discover the developmental benefits of such play for their children. Dr. Howard Gardner, author of Frames of Mind, has identified eight ways in which we gather and process information. Play, which is the work of children, reinforces these intelligences, enabling us to function and learn in a variety of ways. Children who experience learning in multiple ways grow in their self-confidence, accept and appreciate their identity, and are motivated to move on to deeper ways of learning and playing.
My grandson and I stood on a hill during our timber hike, looking over the land around us. We tried to imagine what Kyle's great-great-great-grandfather felt and thought as he stood on that hill for the first time 150 years ago. Did he see wood for a house and fences? wild berries, mushrooms? Did he spot deer at this place, possum, raccoon, pheasant, turkeys? Whatever he saw and felt, Grandfather put down roots and raised a large family. How was his life different from ours on these very same acres? We came up with a list of more than one hundred differences.
History is not the story of battles and conquerors. It is the story of humankind and how it lived, worshiped, coped, experienced the presence of God in the everyday work and play of life. Sometimes the children and I contrive elaborate board games that contain every setback we have had all week; sometimes we make secret trails through the woods; and sometimes we examine social issues through simulation. Such play connects us with the past and the future and helps us see that God is present in all of life.
The fact that we do it together adds value to our play. When parents and their children play together, the children become increasingly aware that their welfare, their safety, their interests, their hopes, and their frustrations are known and respected by the adults. Children also learn to be helpful and cooperative, partnering in this event we share. After all, it is obvious that Grandma will never learn to skateboard well without attentive supervision and help. Time spent with our children is never wasted; if time is spent in play, we add both pleasure and purpose.
Uh-oh. The Diplomatic Coffee Can is back. The boys suggest that a fair rent would be two chocolate bars and two soft drinks. In addition to orchard space, they would also grant access to the creek. I think Slobovia will go for that.
Questions for Discussion and Meditation
1. What would you need to give up, adjust, or neglect to find time to play with your children?
2. How would the benefits of family play outweigh the sacrifices?
3. How does "The Diplomatic Coffee Can" adhere to Ephesians 6:1-4?
4. When is "play" also "instruction"?
5. What are the holy points in the daily news to which your children are responding today? (Note the "bring 'em on" comment.) Do your children express opinions about current news?
6. Do you agree or disagree?
7. Where do you see God acting in history?
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Born to Be a Blessingby Myrtle Felkner Copyright © 2009 by The United Methodist Publishing House. Excerpted by permission of Abingdon Press. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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