Final Chapters

A Dignity Rises, One Common Hero After Another

Evelyn Amdur, a hospice social worker, began to write these stories midway through her career, collaborating with her daughter, Shelley, a respected teacher of meditation in the Chicago area. Many traditional cultures have a custom of 'death songs, ' which rest on the idea that at one's last moment, one somehow sums up the essence of one's life in a phrase or a song. These are truly American death songs. Unlike the austere poetry of the Japanese, which catch the evanescence of life in an image, both beautiful and stark, or the glorious courage of the warriors of the Great Plains, summing up their lives up in a final burst of ecstatic joy, here in language almost artless, in the simplicity of lives much like our own, a dignity rises, one common hero after another.

Woven into these stories are instructions on how to die well-or at least, as well as we can-not only in what spirit we face death itself, but also through instructions on what is necessary to prepare our families, to ready our estates, and to manage all the players who may be involved in our deaths. Finally, these stories also teach others who hold the same responsibilities that Evelyn herself had, be they social services, medical staff, caregivers or families-how to offer the dying as much grace as she did.

I've only met Evelyn Amdur through the pages of this book. She seems like a character from the old days, when people connected personally, with genuine care and love. She knew, intuitively, what others needed to hear, understanding their moral dilemmas. A multi-talented and gifted being, perhaps what stands out most for me was her genius at common sense. Particularly at the end of our lives, she's what we wish for and rarely receive. This is a book for social workers, to be sure, but beyond that, for all of us. Most of all, it is a message from a remarkable woman on how to face our final days, and also how to care for those who walk that road before us. Ondrea Levine, Author: The Life I Took Birth For

Evelyn Amdur, MSW, LSW, was motivated to go into social work as a second career after her husband and both parents died in the early 1970s. After earning her master's degree in social work at the University of Pittsburgh in 1982, she worked at Mercy Hospital, Pittsburgh, providing counseling and discharge planning for patients in the Intensive Care and the Burn Units. Mrs. Amdur worked for the Visiting Nurse Association of Allegheny County in a hospice-type program for ten years. She counseled individuals with life-threatening and/or terminal diseases, helped their family members cope with the stress of the illness and helped them obtain needed social services. After ten years of service she left to build a private counseling practice and to write the vignettes of her clients that now comprise Final Chapters. She was invited to return to hospice work in 1996, at which time she continued to work through the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center Hospice as a social worker/counselor, until one month before her death in 2004, at the age of eighty-two. Evelyn regarded her co-authorship with her daughter Shelley as one of the most rewarding challenges she had attempted as a mother.

Shelley R. Amdur received her B.A in Psychology, and M.B.A. in Micro-Economics from the University of Rochester. After a brief stint in the corporate world, she found her passion for Personal Development. She holds a Certification in Conversational Intelligence®, founded by the distinguished Judith E. Glaser, PhD.As president of the educational consulting firm, Amdur & Associates, she specialized in leadership training, project development and facilitation for teachers, parents and students in the Chicago Public Schools. Her successful five-year program, "Future Leaders of America," using project-based learning, provided innovative learning opportunities for fifth- through eighth-grade students in several high-risk inner-city neighborhoods in Chicago.As founder of the School of Spiritual Cycles, Ms. Amdur teaches meditation and related spiritual topics. Her teaching focuses on integrating spirituality with psychological well-being, harmony in relationships and economic prosperity. She coaches individuals in actualizing their life purpose through the creative use of imagination and ontological inquiry. For more information on Ms. Amdur's work: https://enlightenthemind.com/Ms. Amdur has said that, "Through the writing of this book, my mother and I discovered (just as the individuals we were writing about) that decades-old family issues arose, giving us an opportunity to transform our mother/daughter relationship. The project allowed us to deepen our appreciation for each other, and evolve in wisdom. Final Chapters serves as a vehicle for the fulfillment of the ideals my mother and I both share: to teach others to live with deep authenticity."

Ellis Amdur, Editor, received his B.A. in psychology from Yale University and his M.A. in psychology from Seattle University. He has written eighteen books on the subjects of crisis intervention, hostage negotiation and the art of psychotherapy, many with subject-matter expert co-writers, as well as books on the history of Japanese martial traditions and several works of fiction. All of his books can be found at www.edgeworkbooks.com He is a dynamic public speaker and trainer who presents to people working in a variety of professions throughout the United States and internationally.In addition, Amdur has developed a range of consultation services, as well as a unique style of assessment and psychotherapy. Amdur's professional philosophy can best be summed up as: The development of an individual's integrity and dignity is the paramount virtue. This can only occur when people live courageously, regardless of the circumstances, and take responsibility for their roles in mak- ing the changes they desire.