Poet Laith Biltaji began writing songs and limericks in his head as a child, only committing them to paper later, as a teen. While he draws his inspiration for his poetry from everyday occurrences in his life, it was after reading Michael Crichton's book Travels that he decided to compile a collection of his poems and divide them into four categories: journeys, love, people, and songs. Biltaji's poetry is the product of his personality, which stems from both Middle Eastern roots and global exposure. It is a deconstructed, chronological documentation of his journey through early teenage years, adolescence, and adulthood, documenting influences, people, and his never-ending search for the understanding of life and the supernatural experience of love. His new poetry collection, Inspirations, takes a peek at the inspirations that have shaped his life from his teen years to the present. The poems capture and crystallize the different levels of awareness that he has experienced over a period of twenty-five years. It is that distant region within him and in this world that he has endeavored to uncover and that comes alive in Inspirations.

Inspirations

Poems, Songs, and ReflectionsBy Laith Biltaji

iUniverse, Inc.

Copyright © 2012 Laith Biltaji
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4759-5495-1

Contents

Another...................................................................1Questions at Thirty Thousand Feet.........................................2Senseless.................................................................3My Words Are Your Only Friend.............................................4Hallucinations............................................................5Reflections...............................................................6The Search................................................................7Watching the Day Break....................................................832........................................................................9Earth.....................................................................13Equilibrium...............................................................15Balance: A Reflective Journey into Darkness and Light.....................16Heroes....................................................................18My Demons.................................................................20Reality Check.............................................................22The Buffet Incident.......................................................25Cin Cin...................................................................26The Question..............................................................28Evolution I—Sufi Thoughts...........................................29Evolution II..............................................................30Now Here..................................................................31Fool's Gold...............................................................33You Are My Man............................................................34As I Lay in Her Embrace...................................................36Come to Me................................................................38Emancipation..............................................................39Fantasy-Reality...........................................................40I Love You................................................................41I Wait for You, My Dearest................................................42If We Could...............................................................44In Another Life...........................................................45In Too Deep...............................................................47She Has Taken My Heart....................................................49Love and Honesty..........................................................50New Dawn..................................................................51One More Shot of Vodka....................................................53Open Your Arms............................................................55Our Love-2................................................................56Play or Love..............................................................57Swedish Whims.............................................................58The Dream.................................................................59Thoughts of You...........................................................60In the Absence of Love....................................................62My Words Are My Soul......................................................63I Have Found a Friend.....................................................66Immortal Love (For Bana)..................................................67Juliet....................................................................68The Boy with the Curly Hair...............................................69Last Words................................................................70For Justin................................................................71She.......................................................................72A Thousand Miles..........................................................74Far Side of the Moon......................................................75Lead Me out of This Pain..................................................77Look out of Your Window...................................................78Nobody Else...............................................................79Vignettes.................................................................80What's a Tear?............................................................81With Every................................................................82Your Song.................................................................84I Will Always Love You....................................................85

Chapter One

    Another

    Another ride to the airport
    Another security check
    Another long line at check-in
    Another stamp on my passport to validate another exit
    Another boarding call
    Another trek to the plane
    Another "Welcome on board; please take your seat."
    Another takeoff; my heart stops, then slowly starts to beat.

    Another battle to sleep off the miles
    Another trip to lavatory confinement
    Another "Are you okay in there?"
    Another landing: bumpy, smooth, shaky—I don't really care
    Another "Thank you for flying with us."
    Another "What is the purpose of your visit?"
    Another customs check; I am randomly chosen.
    Another taxi—white, yellow, beige, or orange—"Sorry, sir, this one
    is taken!"

    Another drive through another city
    Another hotel doorman
    Another bellhop with another beaming smile
    Another hotel room, my home for another night
    Another seat at the bar
    Another shot of vodka to help me through
    Another insomniac wandering in the lobby
    Another "Nice to have met you; here's my e-mail—let's start writing!"

    Another day, another night
    Another week, another month
    Another year, full of so many anothers
    Another crossroads: Should I leave or stay for another?


    Questions at Thirty Thousand Feet

    What lies behind our actions?
    What lies behind our closed doors?
    What lies within our minds?
    What lies within our words?

    What makes us separate from all living beings?
    What makes the difference between restraint and control?
    What makes a word so powerful in silence?
    What makes us human, after all?

    When does a choice become an expression?
    When does an action become an event?
    When does eye contact become a passion?
    When does a thought become intent?

    When do we realize that we are mortal?
    When do we realize that we are unique?
    When do we realize that we are fragile?
    When do we realize that we are our psyche?


    Senseless

    Trees I see, yet sky I feel
    Grass I see, yet blue I feel
    Sun I see, yet cold I feel
    I feel nothing beyond what is real.

    I drink and drink, yet thirsty I feel
    I think of her, yet empty I feel
    I hold her, yet lonely I feel
    I feel nothing beyond what is real.

    I hear myself, yet deaf I feel
    I hear her speak, yet I cannot feel
    I hear her scream, yet I cannot feel
    I feel nothing beyond what is real.
    But what is real? What is real?


    My Words Are Your Only Friend

    What is life but an eventful journey of limited time!
    What is death but a seizure of the heart followed by the mind!

    And both, when combined, shall yield
    a treacherous path, with no truths revealed.

    For we live to die and die to live, we hate to love and we love to hate.
    We spend lifetimes wondering about the master above and this
    so-called fate.

    Are destinies prewritten or do we determine our way?
    Are life and death our dictators, or do we have a say?

    Will we ever say what we feel and feel what we say?
    How many words are spoken everyday?

    A day, a year, a decade of my words have been said.
    A century will pass, and my words will spread.

    My words will comfort all those who yearn
    to be warmed by the fire, yet withstand its burn.

    My words are alive although simple in form.
    Read my words with your heart and make them your own

    My words are my fortune; come share my treasure.
    Take my words; make them your daily pleasure.

    Days and years will pass, and lifetimes will begin and end,
    and in your desolation, my words will be your only friend.


    Hallucinations

    The light, hardly enough for visibility
    The air, hardly enough to breathe
    The space, hardly enough to move

    So I set my soul completely free

    As it leaves my body, through the cracks under the rigid door,
    I feel compacted between the thoughts and worries
    of actually being free
    or just a mat of hope on the floor

    Do you see me now, my child?
    Can you feel me, at least?
    Oh, I can feel you.
    Believe me,
    I can smell the prey,
    the beast.

    My sweet little child,
    how can it be so distressing to float without being afraid?
    To love without being scared?
    To crave and not to hunt?
    But be able to scavenge the remains of what can be felt or heard!


    Reflections

    Listening to jazz as I look out of the plane's window,
    I wonder what the day will bring as I land here.
    The lady across the aisle is applying her eye shadow;
    I see her reflection painting the atmosphere.

    I smile at her reflection while captivated by the earth below.
    It is a sea of greens, blues, and autumn browns.
    I am overcome with the notion of a wish I once had to be a
    swallow
    A flashback into my life's ups and downs

    Am I on the up now? Just because I am flying high?
    I seem to drift in and out of consciousness.
    I want to scream, yet I can only muster a grunted sigh.
    I recount my last moments of happiness.

    "Follow your bliss," a voice in my head whispers.
    The plane lands, forcing me out of my trance.
    I place my hand on my chest, my heart murmurs,
    my eyes start to roam, and my feet start to dance.

    I pick myself up, for I have sunk too low.
    I breathe as if I have never breathed before.
    Maybe the day is lost, but there is always tomorrow.
    I step off the plane, exiting a portal, and closing this door.


    The Search

    In the search for completeness, we are divided.
    In the search for holiness, we are sinful.
    In the search for peace, we are riotous.
    In the search for light, we cross through darkness.

    This is the journey we call life,
    and in it are all the paradoxes and contradictions,
    and that is what makes life worthwhile,
    and that is what makes us human.


    Watching the Day Break

    Faded lights in the distance
    A blend of white, blue, and grey
    I watch a plane pulling away from its parking position
    I sit in an airport lounge, to watch the unfolding of my day

    The lounge is full of hungry mouths of many tongues
    A dull and sleepy hue muffles their sounds
    I look out onto the tarmac and beyond, to the dusty airport grounds
    Watching the day break
    Counting the minutes it could take
    Until the sun rises to greet my skin through the double-glazed glass

    Everything seems to move in slow motion
    As if the world waits for the light of the sun to start
    As it seeps through the foggy morning, like golden strands through
    a sieve
    I sift through the tired faces, looking for a sign of life

    The words "Let there be light" echo in my ear
    Another plane pushed back to start its journey
    The sun is shining now, beckoning the world to rise
    And in an amazing union of all elements
    I look out, and the world has risen
    And the pace is up
    And the world is alive
    Let there be light
    Oh! Let there be light


    32

    It has been one whole day
    It has been one whole night
    It has been one whole year
    32, 32, 32

    I can feel it on my face
    I can feel it in my bones
    I can feel it in my soul
    32, 32, 32

    I am one year older
    I am one year simpler
    I am one year more complicated
    32, 32, 32

    I have loved and lost
    I have loved and gained
    I have loved and wounded
    32, 32, 32

    I have hurt and ached
    I have smiled and cheered
    I have contemplated and gazed
    32, 32, 32

    I have seen my children grow
    I have seen my garden grow
    I have seen my world grow
    32, 32, 32

    I have lived through heartaches
    I have lived through joy
    I have lived through confusion
    32, 32, 32

    I have crossed some lines
    I have mended some wounds
    I have strengthened some ties
    32, 32, 32

    I have left some people behind
    I have taken some people aboard
    I have navigated some people through
    32, 32, 32

    I have placed my trust in some
    I have lost my faith in many
    I have struggled with my conscience
    32, 32, 32

    I have felt elevated at times
    I have felt degraded at times
    I have felt indifferent at times
    32, 32, 32

    I have smoked more than my lungs' share
    I have drunk more than my liver's capacity
    I have used a wee of my brain
    32, 32, 32

    I have sat beneath starry skies
    I have lain upon many beaches
    I have knelt before many gods
    32, 32, 32

    I have seen wonderful places
    I have heard different songs
    I have tasted exotic flavors
    32, 32, 32

    I have bought endless dreams
    I have sold countless stories
    I have bargained fringeless deals
    32, 32, 32

    I have sensed many sunrises
    I have ignored more sunsets
    I have slept through eclipses
    32, 32, 32

    I have mourned friends and strangers
    I have celebrated births
    I have observed my life's transitions
    32, 32, 32

    I have written poems and prose
    I have read rhymes and stories
    I have glanced at many papers
    32, 32, 32

    I have embossed moments and emotions
    I have ironed out places and people
    I have erased half my memories
    32, 32, 32

    I have known many women
    I have fantasized about many more
    I have regretted almost none
    32, 32, 32

    I have lived a life that is full
    I have lived a life that is empty
    I have lived a life that is eventful
    32, 32, 32

    I have written about my life now
    I will write again tomorrow
    I will remember it when I am older than
    32, 32, 32


    Earth

    Exorcise me! For I am haunted from within
    Emancipate me! For I no longer want to be a slave
    Entrap me! For I am in need of boundaries
    Enchant me! For I am void of bliss
    You can do it
    I know you can
    It takes one kiss

    Announce me! For I have forgotten my name
    Appease me! For I have become irritable
    Acknowledge me! For I seek your attention
    Assuage me! For I am infatuated with greed
    You can do it
    I know you can
    Your kiss is all I need

    Renounce me! For I am not worthy of you
    Redeem me! For I am unforgivable
    Restrain me! For I am a raging bull
    Reprimand me! For I am full of mistakes
    You can do it
    I know you can
    A kiss is all it takes

    Tutor me! For I am an ignorant soul
    Torment me! For I have become indifferent
    Tantalize me! For I have lost my zest
    Tranquilize me! For I need to be subdued
    You can do it
    I know you can
    With just one kiss from you

    Humiliate me! For I have become too proud
    Honor me! For I feel ashamed
    Harbor me! For I have drifted too long
    Hug me! For I long to hear your heartbeat
    You can do it
    I know you can
    Kiss me; let our lips meet


    Equilibrium

    The earth turns, for the sun to rise and set and rise again;
    The wind blows hard and carries the clouds swelled up with rain.

    A baby is born fatherless in an occupied land;
    His mother cries as they take her son from her hands.

    She has no choice, for what else can she do?
    A decent life for one is better than nothing for two!

    The boy is given a home and a warm feathered bed.
    In the early morning, the mother is found, wrists slashed,
    Rivers of blood and a baby blanket spread on her swollen breasts.

    World equilibrium is then restored,
    A life for a life and a soul for a soul.
    With peace, love, and harmony to all!

(Continues...)

Excerpted from Inspirationsby Laith Biltaji Copyright © 2012 by Laith Biltaji. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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