CHAPTER 1
EMBRACING A DEFINING MOMENT
I thought about my life,and I decided to follow your rules.I hurried and did not waitto obey your commands.—Psalm 119:59-60 NCV
It was shaping up to be the perfect Sunday. The weather wasgorgeous—warm and balmy, not a cloud in the sky. I wasinvited to sing that morning at a church not far from home ina nearby suburb of Atlanta, so my husband, Charles, and I hadattended worship there.
After church Charles and I were heading to a friend's house,where I would celebrate Donna—one of my dearest friendsin all the world as well as my songwriting buddy—by helpingto throw her a bridal shower. I was on my way to partake ofan afternoon of levity and laughter and celebrate one of thebiggest moments in my friend's life, and I was enjoying lightheartedconversation with Charles, my man, my husband ofthirty-three years. The day couldn't have been more special.
I was driving the car that day. Atlanta's traffic is always congested,even on a Sunday afternoon. I got off the freeway andstopped at the light at the end of the exit ramp. We sat in thecenter lane of traffic, my view to the left obstructed by a van.When the light changed to green, I was approaching the intersectionwhen the driver of that van suddenly slammed on hisbrakes and laid on his horn. Instinct kicked in, and I slammedon my brakes as well. Just then, a car came racing from the left,speeding through the intersection, running the light. Had I notstopped precisely at the moment I did, had I been a few moreinches into the intersection, that speeding vehicle that I neversaw coming would have T-boned our car.
I sat frozen in the intersection, unable to move. All I coulddo was call on the name of Jesus. I shudder to think how thingscould have turned out so differently that day, but God in allHis grace and mercy saw fit to spare our lives. There's no doubtin my mind that angels of protection were encamped aroundus that Sunday afternoon. In the next few moments and days,that incident replayed in my mind. That narrow miss thrustthe issue of my mortality to the forefront, and I was forced toreview my life. I wondered, If those had been my final momentson earth and I had been ushered into eternity, would God havebeen pleased with the life I had lived? I was not asking, Would Hehave been pleased with the songs I've written or awards I've wonor people I've met or places I've been? Instead I pondered, WouldGod have been pleased with me and my relationship with Him?Would He be pleased with how I've represented Him here on earth?
Deep in my heart I want to live every day to the fullest, rightup to the moment I breathe my last breath and then hear theLord say, "Well done, good and faithful servant." One of thefirst questions I asked myself was not, Am I ready to die? No, I'mcertain that if today were my last day on earth, I'd go home toheaven to be with Jesus. The question I faced was, Am I reallyliving the life God designed me to live?
The words of Psalm 138:7 are a powerful reminder of how Godraised up a hedge of protection for me and showed Himself strongin a very real way:
Though I walk in the midst of trouble,you preserve my life.You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes;with your right hand you save me. (NIV)
Dr. Ravi Zacharias, a well-known Christian author, theologian,and apologist of the Christian faith, said so aptly: "God is theshaper of your heart.... God does not display his work in abstractterms. He prefers the concrete, and this means that at the endof your life one of three things will happen to your heart: it willgrow hard, it will be broken, or it will be tender. Nobody escapes."Aware of this truth now more than ever before, I desire to yieldmy heart, tender and trembling, and place it in God's hands. Notonly do I desire to know God's plan for my life here on earth, butI'm determined to see that plan through right up until my verylast breath.
SO OTHERS WILL KNOW HIM
I recently heard a story that made me consider the confidenceI have in God. It was art day in a kindergarten boy's class. Ashe took out his paints and brushes, he announced, "I'm goingto color a picture of God."
"But no one knows what God looks like," responded histeacher.
"They will when I get finished," the little boy said withcertainty.
I like that little fellow's attitude. He has a child like confidencein God that is truly admirable. I'm a bit envious. I have prayedfor that kind of gumption—for the gall to stick my neck outand paint God in big, bold colors.
That day of my near accident, I took inventory of my faithin Christ. I wondered, Babbie, do you really love Jesus? Does yourcommitment to Him run deep, all the way down to the foundationof your soul? Sure, I made Jesus my Savior a long time ago. Butthe close call at that intersection forced me to recommit everyarea of my life to Him all over again. I realize that this life Godhas given me and my relationship with Him that springs forthfrom it are precious. And out of that relationship comes myassignment to serve Him and others. In light of that revelation,average is just not good enough anymore. Jesus deserves only thebest. I am determined to give Him what's right, not what's left.
The Apostle Paul says in Philippians 3:8-9, "Yes, everythingelse is worthless when compared with the infinite value ofknowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discardedeverything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gainChrist and become one with him" (NLT). To do anything lessis to compromise. I was reminded that life is precious and todayis a gift from God. What I do with today is my gift to Him. Iam to take nothing for granted. Not my family, my friends, ormy church. Not my work, my play, or my worship, not evenmy next breath, because all of it could be gone in an instant.I have a new sense of urgency and a desire to live with intentand purpose. There is a newfound hunger to live an authenticlife. More than ever before, I pray that what happens when I'monstage becomes an overflow of who I am when the lights godown and the music stops rolling. My prayer is that the BabbieMason people see under the bright lights onstage is one and thesame with the woman they see under the glaring fluorescentlighting of the grocery store.
I've asked God to grant me many more opportunities to saylike that little boy in art class, "People will know what Godlooks like when I'm finished." There is a lifetime of work leftfor me to do. I'm still here, so it's evident that God is notfinished with me yet.
LESS DOING, MORE BEING
David's prayer in Psalm 119:59-60 says,
I thought about my life,and I decided to follow your rules.I hurried and did notwait to obey your commands. (NCV)
Sometimes we need a good old-fashioned reality check toget us on the right road, don't we? God is teaching me not to beso concerned about the work He has left for me to do. I've beenway too obsessed with doing the work. I admit I have far toooften worshiped my work. I confess the ministry at times hasbeen an idol. And at times, I've been caught up in the thingsI've been able to accomplish, proud of my to-do list.
I now know that God is not the least bit impressed with myto-do list. Instead, with God's help, I am learning to be moreconcerned about His to-do list. There is a work God wants me todo. But I must not make that the priority. That moment revealedto me that God wants to do a greater work in me; God is moreconcerned about my to-be list. And the work He does in me iswhat I truly desire much more than anything He could ever dofor me. If He doesn't do anything else for me, He's done enough.However, He's the God who never stops investing in us. He isalways calling us to come up higher. Jesus opened my eyes tothe awareness that He is shaping me and making me, on a dailybasis, to be more like Him. The process of shaping and making isat times uncomfortable, even painful. But through that process,I become the person He wants me to be. And as I become theperson He wants me to be, the doing will take care of itself.
THIS DEFINING MOMENT
If you could orchestrate the ideal last day of your life, whatwould it look like? Suppose that the lights on your life wouldgo down by the end of tomorrow. How would you spend theremaining hours? Would you spend your time with family andloved ones? Would you spend it praying? Would you visit anaging parent? Would you hold your grandbabies? Perhaps youwould throw a party, serve delicious food, dance, and celebratewith your family and friends. Would you say words you've beenneeding to say for a long time? Words like these: I love you. I'mso sorry. Would you forgive me?
I'm asking you not to wait for that one defining momentthat causes you to examine your life or your faith. Don't waitfor the near miss to ask the Holy Spirit to shine His light onyour heart. Instead, think about what if this moment was yourdefining moment?
In this moment, I'm challenging you to ask and allow Godto examine your life and to show you how He wants you todraw near to Him. But don't get it wrong here. God doesn'tuse guilt to shame or to humble you. By His Holy Spirit, Hedraws you to Himself. With conviction and truth, He leads youto recognize it's time for change. And with His help, change isjust a prayer away.
Begin by asking yourself very real, very pertinent questions:
Do I really love God as I say I do?
Do I really believe God's word?
Am I putting God's plan for my life into practice?
Where do my priorities lie?
Am I obsessed with my accomplishments?
Do I care more about impressing people than pleasing God?
Am I painting God in big, bold colors for all the world to see?
Take the time to digest these questions and answer with anhonest spirit. What is God revealing to you? Where do you feelHis presence urging you to draw close to Him? As you wrestle withthese questions and open yourself up to where God is leading,prepare your mind. Decide that you will be honest and transparentwith God, giving Him permission to do His work in you. Thenprepare your heart. Be honest with yourself by submitting yourselfto God and receive the fresh start He offers you.
If your response is, "Lord, I'm not sure how to do this, butI'm ready to make the first step toward becoming the personYou want me to be," that's the perfect starting place. If you'reready to shore up your faith in Christ, boost your confidencein His word, strengthen your resolve, embolden your witness,raise your hopes, and increase your desire to paint God in big,bold colors, then embrace this defining moment. This I knowfor sure: there's no better time than the present to begin.