A spiritual and knowledgeable woman once told me that I was a Sacred Prostitute. She explained that a Sacred Prostitute is someone who soothes, nurtures and heals another and then sends them on their way to find their true destiny, a better, more emotionally complete person for the experience. I was initially confused, but eventually relieved and elated by this possibility. I sometimes felt guilty because it wasn't possible for me to ignore a woman who was strong or beautiful or talented or sweet. I had many deep but relatively short lived relationships. I was in love with many of these women. I respected and admired every single one of them. I found them simply amazing. I was never looking for notches on a bedpost, only searching for my one true Love. Many left me and moved on, found another. I was left alone, again and again, wondering . . . But maybe there was a reason for such an active lovelife. Maybe I really am a Sacred Prostitute! After all, very few of the women seemed to hate me when we parted. And most were married shortly after their time spent with me. I can't tell you why I was chosen as a Sacred Prostitute. I can't tell you how to become one yourself. But, in this book, I share the journeys, the thoughts and passions of 89 women that loved one, in their own words.
Love Letters to a Sacred Prostitute
By GaryAuthorHouse
Copyright © 2012 Gary
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4772-6264-1Chapter One
Letter #1: Postmarked: July 10, 1967
Gary, Hope you like this picture, cause I don't. I got L's letter that you wrote. I mean it wasn't my business. Hope you're having a great time with L. at camp. Remember to go with L. is not to go with me.
Love ya S.
Chapter Two
Letter #2: Postmarked: July, 1967
Hi! Luv!
Your not going to flip out! - NO! Alright than! How's camp? L? Tell her to write! Do you still luv S? Everything is the GROV! (my hippy word) There's a hippy counsler up here. He wears red granny glasses & has long hair. S.G., P.B., S.S., says "hello". N. wrote me & I still love his ass! Camps a ball! ugh. I just got into a shaving cream fight and forget it! Gary your right I'm not the camp type I'm just the type for _________________________ you guessed it!!??? Love ya, L. I write a long letter soon
Chapter Three
Letter #3: Circa: December, 1971
Dear Gary, The train has not pulled out yet, and how I long to see your little face still peeping through the window. You're my wonderful little man who I already miss. Love is so important in my life, and you fulfill that need so completely.
Much Love, BIG BLUE
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself. But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires: To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To know the pain of too much tenderness. To be wounded by your own understanding of love. And to bleed willingly and joyfully. To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving. To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy!
Letter #4: Circa: March, 1972
Dearest Little Peach,
Good morning, it is 8 o'clock in the morning & we'll be entering Florida in about 10 minutes. We left yesterday at 8 o'clock so we've made really good time! A. just told me it was cold and snowing in N.Y., I can't believe how warm it's gotten! I have seen two police cars our entire trip, one in South Carolina & one a minute ago here in Georgia.
Georgia is very pretty but also extremely poor, I can't believe that people actually live in some of the shacks I've seen along the road. I saw the cutest little pigs today, a tiny brown one & an even smaller white one. They were playing right along side of the road until a real cocky rooster (which looked like ours) chased them away. Remember the moss that grew on the trees all around Happy Camp (A. used it in her loom), well it's all over down here.
The sun just broke through the clouds and the morning is just beautiful. J. drove all through the night, through the rain and fog! We brought 6 joints with us & A. brought 6 ups. A. slept through the night and J. and I got high and talked for a long time. We smoked all the grass before we reached Virginia though. A. just told me we were about 150 miles from Cocoa.
There are alot of factories in Georgia (which somehow I just didn't expect), and alot of the pretty little lakes along the road are filled with garbage & sort of a foam. Also there are alot of very shady looking Palm Readers shacks. I can't believe how blue the sky is getting, Florida here I come!
Hope you got home all right after you left me on the train, I was a little worried! J. picked me up and we went to a party at this guy B.'s house. I had alot of fun & I got so stoned I could hardly see. We were drinking pina colada (with rum - I loved them) & I had about 4 glasses of champagne plus an endless amount of marihuana. At about 1:30 we went back to the dorm & I stayed up to 3:30 or 4:00 talking to this guy M. We (you & I) stayed in his room & he is so nice! He was in Europe when we stayed there in his room.
Mother Popcorn is playing on the tape player, it's so nice to have a tape recorder when you're traveling! I haven't minded the ride at all, we've been munching on granola, apples, raisins & lots of juices.
I've been navigator & a damn good one may I add! We haven't gotten lost once. Oh, I found out when we're leaving Florida Sat night.
Well A. looks like he's dozing & I should talk to him. Now he's movin & groovin to Good Morning Little School Girl!
We've passed alot of Civil War famous battlegrounds, it's so hard to believe that men once crawled through the woods we've passed - constantly on their guard for the enemy.
We just drove into Florida YIPEE!!
Gary, this is a new letter so read the pages as they're numbered.
I am sitting on a bus in Orlando waiting for it to pull out. How I got here I'm still trying to figure out! J. & A. left me off in Cocoa at the bus station & continued on their way to Miami. So ... I got to talking to this guy who worked there (it was 1:30 & I had to wait till 4 to catch my bus). He was so nice, and offered to bring me to Orlando to save me some money. K. (that's his name) told me to come on back to the baggage room till he got off work at three. I had so much fun, he was wheeling me all around on his baggage cart & I weighed myself on the gigantic scale. When he got off work we went and bought a bottle of wine and went to his friends house right on the beach. Then I had to go catch my bus in Orlando, so me, K. & his friend J. piled in his car & raced to get there 'cause I thought I'd miss the bus. K. and J. were so nice, I really love to meet new people. They were telling me all about Europe, & I told them all about Happy Camp. So we got to the bus station and found out the next bus to Clearwater was 9:15 the next morning. K. asked me to stay overnight & we'd go to Disney World the next day but I didn't want to. So I called my grandma and she said she'd pick me up in Tampa. I said goodbye to K. and boarded the bus. Isn't it strange how you can be so close to someone or something in such a short period of time & then have to say goodbye - perhaps forever. But it makes me feel so good inside when I meet a really fine person (just exactly how I felt when I met you little one.) Before I go on I must tell you I adore you!
Well it's Monday night & we've just finished dinner. My grandma is sitting next to me knitting slippers for me & my grandpa is sitting in his chair smoking his pipe. I love them so much! I went shopping today & got 2 new pairs of pants & then we went out to lunch. Later we went to the beach & I took a long walk down the beach with my grandma, collecting shells. She is such a wonderful woman, I'll have to tell you all about her when I return.
Did A. leave yet? I hope you've been having a good time! I miss you very much and think of you all the time. Oh guess what - my grandmother & I went to the drugstore to get me more medicine & they wouldn't do it without a perscription - I couldn't believe it! My medicine ran out Sat. night. So when I get home I'll have to fill it & it will be another week. Just thought I'd warn you so it wouldn't come as a shock - like it did to me!
Well I want to mail this & here comes the mailman.
I love you madly.
Much Love, K.
Letter #5: Postmarked: July 11, 1972
Dearest Gary,
It is late Monday evening as I sit in my rocking listening to Carol King sing "You're So Far Away." and wanting you so bad. My whole body feels your absence, I haven't wiggled my toes in contentment for so long, and the inside of my thighs just tingle with the thought of you. I miss you so, sweet baby! So many nights I have laid awake for hours praying that when I turned over I would feel your warm, naked body next to me. I yearn so much to run my fingers through your thick, curly locks & snuggle close my tongue tickeling your ear.
I got your wonderful letter yesterday, it made me so happy! I love you so little one, I long for you. I'm so glad you are getting your van, you must be so excited! A brand new one yet, have you sold you car? I got a letter from A. yesterday also, a wonderfully happy one. Even K. wrote his small piece, they sounded so mellow and content with life in Happy Camp!
Life here is just beautiful, the countryside is so green & the sunsets amazing. K. and I moved into a friend's cottage right on Lake Michigan a few days ago. We just came in from the beach after watching the sun set. Each morning I awake with the waves crashing along the shore & take a long run on the beach which is a fantastic way to start the day! The drive here was very mellow, up through Canada right past Niagara Falls. We reached the falls about three in the afternoon and the sun was making a huge rainbow form over the falls. I was truly amazed, had never expected Niagara Falls to be so powerful and breath taking. I thought of that picture of you in that tremendous rain coat as a little person. I sure would loved to have known you when you were little, we could have been childhood sweet hearts.
We were staying in T.'s big tent on top of a huge dune for awhile but we weren't getting along to well. He tried to get very possesive and K. & I were both beginning to get very fed up with him anyway. We've met so many really fine people, one of my friends has a 60 acre farm. He is into stain glass and makes money from selling his work, you would love him. The people around here are so warm and friendly!
You'll flip out when I tell you where I've been working, at the Crystal Valley Tavern. My friends parents own it (they are really far out!) so I work on band nights, Wednesday & Saturday. It's a real down home, funky, rowdy bar, we have alot of fun! The band is really quite good, they do "Mojo Workin", "Kansas City" & "Johnny Be Good" & they're really nice, we have become very tight. I make about 15$ a night plus free drinks after it closes & tips. I've learned alot about liquor & although I'm not a barmaid I've mixed a few drinks. That's to bad about Alice's, J. was a real tight ass anyway. You should work at the tavern the guys make 30$ a night apiece! K. & I baked whole wheat & rye bread today. Cause we're going on a picnic to a little stream with a beautiful waterfall, with some friends tomorrow.
I am hitching to Detroit Wed. to meet D. as she's flying here. I've never hitched so far before but D. is coming with me to protect me from all the weirdos. He is such a fine guy, he came with T. to pick us up. We are very close friends, K., D., & I are like a trio or the Three Muskateers. We went water skiing the other day, I'm getting pretty good!
I've been keeping my diary faithfully also, I love writing in it!
From July 3rd entry,
He looked so sweet and nice in my dream, I long to feel his warm body pressing close against mine. To kiss his tender lips until I become breathless with ecstacy. To taste his loving tongue ticking the roof of my mouth, to smell his wonderful, manly fragrance. To see his huge penis longing to enter my warm, juicy vagina. His head between my legs and to feel my every nerve taut with excitement, to fall back in his tender, sensitive arms finally, exhausted, fulfilled.
This my darling was written to and about you. I think of you always, I long for October 1st to see your beautiful face once again.
Take care and please don't stop loving me. I love you more than these words can express. I feel your presence so strongly at times. Stay happy and enjoy this wondeful summer.
I love you so very, very much
K.
Letter #6: Postmarked: July 24, 1972
Dear Gary,
Omaha is just wonderful! It is early afternoon and the sun is very warm - every now and then a cool breeze sweeps through the trees & cools me off.
I arrived here Wednesday evening, as perhaps your mother told you. I called from O'Hare airport. I had been staying in East Lansing for a few days with my friend M. & she & this guy B. gave me a ride to Chicago Wed. Had a really good time in Lansing, the penalty there for smoking reefer is a 5$ fine! Both my parents went to Michigan State (which is in East Lansing) so it felt really nice to walk around the campus. What a beautiful, old campus! B. took me on a guided tour one day & we went to the Botanical Gardens, a really far out museum & an art show all on campus. Met lots of mellow people, it just amazes me how many people I've met since I left N.Y.! Of course my favorite is still you, darling!
Had my tarot cards read by this chick in Lansing. Wow I wish you could have met her, she was a gypsy! My spirits are really looking up, I feel so free and alive! I have been keeping my diary every day, it's really alot of fun.
Have you ever heard of a band called CRACKEN? D.'s cousin B. is in it and plays lead guitar. They are very big in the midwest, you'd like them they're into country blues. On Thursday we went to De Moines with the entire band, road manager & friends in a pick-up truck camper, with a big U-haul trailer attached to carry all their equipment. They had a gig all weekend at a club called Fridays Child, we had so much fun! The band was great, I was dancing all night & you know how unusual that is! All the guys in the band are so nice & very talented, especially D., the drummer. Aside from playing the drums, he plays guitar (slide, superbly!), piano, horn & sings! To bad you're not here they are looking for a good harp player & make 200$ bucks & more a night! Have you decided to go to the Ann Arbor Blues Festival? They might be there, they are moving to Woodstock sometime next month.
So what's doing with your own band, are you playing anywhere? How are all the fellas? I loved the picture of you with your van, you must be overjoyed! You should make a trip to New England before you start your journey.
We are leaving for Colorado on Monday in some girls' camper, I can't wait!
Just wanted to let you know what I'm doing. Mainly I'm thinking of you, particularly late at night when I want to hold you so bad. Really no one has been able to take your place, the last person I loved was you.
I miss you, I love you
K.
Postmarked: July, 1972
Dearest Gary,
I thought this card was so beautiful, it described how I felt so perfectly. Really darling no-one has been able to fill your place. I fully appreciate how wonderful you are now. I miss you so little plum!
I thought the pictures of you & your van just perfect, do you really miss the old goat? Keep your smile, think of me often & soon we will be together once again!
Every night my eyes wander up into the sky and I think of you so intensely I can almost feel your presence. Your love makes me complete.
I love you, K.
Letter #8: Postmarked: August, 1972
Dearest baby I love you so ... I've thought so much of you today - I wonder have you felt my tears? My mind wanders amidst all the time we have spent together, everything we've shared. Gary, you are the closest person to me, no one knows me as you do.
I've experienced and seen much since I left your side - one of the things I've completely realized is how beautiful you are. I have found no one who could give me love as only you can, nor anyone I could relate to as I did with you - the emotional level on which we flow could not be higher.
I am breathlessly looking forward to our joining & I want it to be one of pure delight, as I am sure it shall come with all the love you've saved for me but don't smother me. I have grown up so much in the recent months and I am very independent. Please understand, it is most important to me that you do. Being a highly emotional person, I do want you to not only feel me but understand why I feel as I do.
I am not into living with you at this period in my life - only because I crave my freedom. I enjoy being alone and able to go as I please, there are so many things I want to do and see before I settle down with an 'old man'. I know that someday I shall and most likely it will be with you - the one I love more than anyone - no one have I ever felt as great a love for, my dearest. If you cannot accept this please don't meet me on October 1st, I am dying to see you but only without the heavy feelings that may follow. If you do truly love me you will save me that hurt. My mind is steadfast and I really don't think there is any point in reliving that whole crazy scene. Come to the city if it's what you want - I want you to feel as happy & at peace with yourself as I do. I know I shall be living at least until March in our flat as we have signed a lease - I am finally completely managing on my own & it feels so wonderfully far-out. I need room to dance, shout, breathe & just grow wiser. I must ride the wind, being tossed about gently with her wispy, light caresses. Please Gary, come to me full of love & because you love and want to see me but don't tie me down or pressure me into a situation I don't want.
I'll love you more for it
I long for you
K.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Love Letters to a Sacred Prostituteby Gary Copyright © 2012 by Gary. Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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