CHAPTER 1
The Mind*Brain Matrix
We imagine that our thought can be kept secret, but it cannot — it rapidly crystallizes into habit, and habit solidifies into circumstance.
— James Allen, As a Man Thinketh
Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? The brain wants to be right. In fact, it has to be right at all costs, which often compromises your happiness. Your mind, on the other hand, just wants to be happy. And while both your brain and your mind are "all about me," the brain is the small m in me, and the mind is the large M in Me.
Now, the argument that scientists are likely to make is that when they open up the head, all they find is the brain. So where's the mind? The mind is like electricity. Electricity is energy that can't be seen, but you know it's there when you turn on a light. The mind is energy that can't be seen, but you know it's there when your focused awareness is present in the moment. The mind is undetectable yet distinct from the brain.
We're beginning with this concept because it's the starting point for all the other parts of The Mind*Brain Matrix. Most of us have grown up believing that what we're thinking at any given time is what we're supposed to be thinking. After all, it's our brain doing the thinking. On closer examination, however, we find that what pops into our heads appears to be quite random as our brain wanders.
The premise of The Mind*Brain Matrix is that there's a difference between the brain and the mind. An easy way to think about this difference is to equate your brain with a computer and your mind as the conductor that directs the brain to use the knowledge, memories, and experiences stored in your brain's computer. Your mind should always be in control. Would you let your home computer run your life? There may be a time in the future when computers will be able to (or even worse, want to) run your life, but for right now, you should be in charge. Computers are great at doing many things, but the beauty of being human is that we can reason with our heads and our hearts. The computer, although evolving, can only operate using the information programmed into it.
So let us look at how this programming works. You do something multiple times in order for the brain to learn an activity, whether it's tying your shoes, adding numbers, driving a car, or smoking a cigarette. The brain turns that activity into a behavior. Once it's a behavior, your brain promotes it to make your life easier and to help you survive in the world. Imagine if you had to learn everything you know all over again every single day.
Smoking cigarettes was included on the list because you can create unhealthy behaviors just as easily as good ones (sometimes more easily!). The brain isn't going to question the behaviors you perform; it's simply going to continue to follow those behaviors until the mind intervenes (or doesn't).
See, your mind is responsible for how and whether the content and behaviors stored in your brain are exercised. If you choose to keep the mind out of the process, the brain will operate independently. If you've learned only useful behaviors, you might be fine (as long as someone else's brain doesn't get in your way), but what if you learned an unhealthy behavior? If your mind doesn't do anything to modify that program, the brain will continue to run that program until it destroys you. The brain doesn't care. The brain isn't designed to care. Conversely, your mind is designed to care. The mind is where your judgment resides.
To simplify this interaction, let's use the example of a parent and a child. In this case, the parent is the mind, and the child is the brain. When you're a baby, you're fully dependent on your parents or guardians. As you grow, you still rely on them for guidance and support, but they're supplemented by teachers, coaches, and, to a lesser extent, peers and relatives. Hopefully, to an even lesser extent, you're also influenced by the media, but I can't leave them out (although we all might be better off if we did!).
Would you tell a two-year-old something that you know wouldn't be in the child's best interest? Of course not, because you know the child wouldn't question what you're telling him or her; they would just do it. Similarly, the brain doesn't question what you tell it to do. If the mind doesn't correct the situation, the activity will be reproduced until it becomes a behavior.
In your early years, most of what your mind and brain do are basic activities performed by your parents or guardians. These activities require little thought, mainly due to the fact that you have little knowledge or experience to draw from in making decisions. To this point, the brain of the child is getting its direction from the parents. It's for that reason that the parents need to take an active role in their child's life. If the adults around you are taking their responsibilities seriously, you'll get loving attention and be read to, and you'll get good nutrition, plenty of restful sleep, and a healthy supply of physical activity. All these positive experiences will begin to establish healthy habits, both mentally and physically. However, if the adults around you are negligent in their responsibilities, a two-year-old brat is likely.
If that two-year-old bratty kid just wants what it wants — no explanation needed and none given — chances are more likely than not that real fundamental development may stop. I know in psychology circles it's a bad word to talk about discipline, but what's needed at this stage of Mind*Brain development are clear routines and healthy habits.
As the child grows up with the proper basics, the child's mind will begin to take over the role of giving guidance to the brain. Using this understanding, it's not difficult to see why children who grow up with little or no guidance are easily influenced by outside sources. On the surface, this may appear to be simplistic, but if the brain develops with flawed fundamentals, the mind won't develop to take its proper role of guiding the brain. As a result, the brain will be easily influenced by those outside sources. Clearly, parents and guardians, a child's most influential teachers, play an important role in the relationship between the brain and the mind.
Our brain is like a garden, and our mind is the gardener. (Thank you, Mr. Shakespeare.) The brain of the child is fertile soil, and every bit of knowledge and every single experience is a seed. The seeds are planted from our first breath and continue to be planted till our last. It's not hard to see that if the proper seeds aren't planted, the necessary harvest will never be realized. It's safe to say that if you plant a bitter herb, a bitter herb is what you'll get.
We understand that in the physical world, so why is it we have such a hard time seeing it in the mental realm? This is why a wide and varied exposure to knowledge in the arts and sciences is so positive and uplifting in one's life. This doesn't mean that you have to go to college to receive this kind of knowledge. Many people who never attended college and who chose to continue learning after high school are better versed in the humanities than many college graduates who pursued a technical course of study. It does, however, require the lifelong pursuit of knowledge. Albert Einstein attributed his unique abilities to a lifelong pursuit of knowledge.
Now, where does the mind come in using this model? The mind is the gardener. In even the finest gardens, drifting seeds from weeds are blown or through other means deposited among the seeds. It's the mind's task to eliminate those weeds (negative thoughts) when they emerge. We all get them, but some minds are better at weeding than others. The ideal situation (not the guy from Jersey Shore) is to prevent them from establishing themselves altogether.
How do you do that, you ask? By taking control of what goes in that beautiful brain of yours. Choose the people you're going to interact with. Family is hard, and the best you might be able to do is limit your contact. But remember your brain is at stake.
Read uplifting material that adds to your knowledge and contributes joy to your life. Listen to music that's relaxing and makes you feel good; stay clear of music that makes you hyper and drives up your blood pressure.
Be careful about the movies and television shows you choose to watch. There are many programs that enhance the brain, rather than tearing it down and giving nightmares. Never, and I mean never, watch the news. There are many ways to remain informed about the world around you without watching the news. You're not a more informed person because you know how many people died in a fire today. All you gain from news like that is negativity to your brain. You can be sure of that!
As you journey through this book, you'll find The Mind*Brain Matrix is the foundation of the various issues discussed. This book doesn't claim to have all the answers, but it will deal with these issues in a commonsense manner. If you begin to feel lost as you make your way through the pages of this book, you can always come back and reread this first chapter since it's intentionally designed to support the foundation on which the rest of this book is built.
The Garden
I entered the garden,
And the silence was deafening.
Like a breezeless wind,
It blew away my thoughts.
I stood motionless and
Took in the beauty that surrounded me.
The sights, the smells, the sounds
Wrapped me in a blanket of peace.
I don't know when
I have ever felt so alive,
And I knew in that moment
That I wanted to feel this way always.
I entered the garden,
And the silence was deafening.
My thinking brain ceased,
And my mind chose to be!
Doings for Being
Doing and being are different, this is true, but sometimes while you are learning to be, it helps to do something!
There will be a "Doings for Being" between each chapter. I would encourage you to try them all as you move through the book. You will enjoy them all (how's that for positive?), and many of them you will continue long after you finish this book and possibly for the rest of your life!
These of course are only suggestions, and you are not required to try any of them. But what you might find if you do them is that they will begin to draw you into a state of alert consciousness, making it easier to enter and stay in the moment! What I do know is that as you go through them, you will find your own doings for being until being becomes so natural that doing will no longer be required!
The first doing for being is to listen to a piece of classical music. Try listening to Bach, Beethoven, or Mozart (Wagner might be tough for novices) to start if you don't already listen to classical music. Try a piano or violin piece. Close your eyes (unless you are driving!) and just listen. Music comes and goes, but this music will relax and transfix the mind in the present moment. It is not the intent that you listen only to classical music. A lot of new age and even some smooth jazz is equally relaxing, but if you want to relax and activate the mind, classical works extremely well!
Some suggested pieces of music to start with might include: J. S. Bach, the Partitas 1 through 6; L. von Beethoven, the Moonlight Sonata; or, W. A. Mozart, Piano Concerto no. 1, Elvira Madigan. A more contemporary classical composer that you might want to try is Ludovico Einaudi. For a more modern sound, you might try music from George Winston, Jim Brickman, or Suzanne Ciani. Set a button on your car radio to a classical station (my favorite is WQXR 105.9 FM in New York, but they also have a website, so you can listen anywhere in the world!) for your next hard day at work or your next traffic jam. (You might even find you like it!)
You know what music is? God's little reminder that there's something else besides us in this universe; harmonic connection between all living beings, everywhere, even the stars.
— Robin Williams in August Rush
CHAPTER 2
Our Goals and a GPS
If you think you can, or you think you can't, you're always right.
— Henry Ford, My Life and Work
There has been a lot written about goals and their importance in a complete life. I'm sure you are familiar with setting and achieving goals, but let's look at goals from a different angle by comparing goals to the GPS in your car. Those of you who may not be familiar with GPS, or global positioning satellite, it is a device that locates your current position using a satellite. You type in your destination, and it gives you step-by-step directions on how to get there. (I like the female voice with the British accent — just a suggestion.) The most important part is knowing your destination. Without that information, the device doesn't work very well. (Actually, it won't work at all!) The GPS can't guess where you want to go. (Now if you were reading this book in 2080, the GPS might be able to, so you can disregard this section!)
Relying on a GPS is not foolproof. Just because the GPS tells you where to go, you can still make a wrong turn. When that happens, it will recalculate and attempt to get you back on the right track. As a matter of fact, if you choose to ignore the directions altogether, you can go in the complete opposite direction, and other than continuing to recalculate (which gets annoying after a while), the GPS can't make you go in the right direction.
Do you see the similarity between a GPS and goals? (If yes, skip to the next paragraph. If no, read on.) The most important ingredient in setting goals is knowing your destination or end result. When your mind has a clear idea of what you want, it can begin the task of developing the steps (or turns) you need to make in order to reach your goal. Sure you may make missteps along the way, but with the goal in mind, the mind can get you back on course, making the necessary recalculations, moving you in the right direction.
The goal of this chapter is not to convince you that all you need to do is establish a clearly defined goal and you will always reach it (I wish with a clear conscience I could!), but having a clearly defined goal will vastly improve your chances of achieving it. I do know for sure that without a clearly defined goal, you don't have a chance or a choice to improve your life!
Taking this concept one step farther, what if God worked like a GPS or God prompting system? (You can replace God with a higher power or whatever you would like.) This author takes the phase "God helps those that help themselves" at face value. You pick the goal (free will), God gives you the knowledge and wisdom you need (the directions), and you are responsible for getting there. Now, when you go off course, signals are given to get you back on course, but God does not intervene and turn your life around. You have to do that (by using free will). Of course, it would be great if everyone just got out of your way and you could be the only one on the road. But sometimes people do get in your way. How can you overcome those obstacles? More often than not, you can get to your destination (goal) by relying on clarity of focus and a reasonable degree of patience.
