Proverbs 31: 10 "For who can find a virtous woman, for her price is far above rubies."

Based upon the struggles of a young woman in ministry, whose a single mother faced with the obstacles of bad relationships, disabled children, and hypocrisy in the church. Just when you think you are all alone, God always steps in and let's us know that we are never alone. God has blessed me with so many great people to help me to go through and survive every experience in my life, so that I didn't have to feel alone. I didn't understand all that he was doing while going through, but each time I came out, I came out with a praise. This book has helped me to heal wounds of the past, which I unconsciously suppressed for so many years. While in the process of desiring to heal others and help them to begin a journey down the Road to Recover, God has now restored me. God help me to understand that as you travel down the road of life, I had to travel "One Way," and that's God's way. I have done things my way for so long that I now realize I'm not Ms. Burger King, I can't have everything my way. There are some roads that you will come to in life that will have a "Caution" sign and that's a major clue to "Do not enter." One bad decision in life can cost a lifetime of pain and suffering. As you come to the crossroads in you life, slowdown and stop or else you may come to a dead end. As you began to travel the road, just remember if you began to get weak God is there is carry you the remaining distance of the way. May heaven forever smile upon you always!

Conquering Gospel Ministry, Inc.
Prophetess Jennifer D. Long
P. O. Box 12919
Jacksonville, FL 32209

On The Road 2 Recover

By Jennifer D. Long

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2011 Jennifer D. Long
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4567-6206-3

Contents

Preface vChapter 1: Born To Worship.......................................1Chapter 2: Knowing Your Purpose...................................9Chapter 3: Love In All the Wrong Places..........................17Chapter 4: The Breaking Point....................................27Chapter 5: I've Been Hurt........................................37Chapter 6: Great Women Have Great Weaknesses.....................53Chapter 7: After The Pain........................................63Chapter 8: A Mother's Love.......................................73Chapter 9: Tied Up & Tangled Up...................................79Chapter 10: Nothing To Lose......................................89Dedication........................................................105

Chapter One

Born To Worship

Jeremiah 1:5" Before I formed you in the belly I knew you; and before youcame forth out of the womb I sanctified you, and I ordained you a prophet tothe nations."

Were you born to worship? Born July 9, a seventies baby, was the birthof one who would surely find out. A baby girl was born to Bishop Jimmie L.Long, Sr. and Joyce D. Hall-Long, her name Jennifer Denise Long. I wasraised in Jacksonville, FL all of my life, with one sister Felicia L.E. Jamesand one brother Jimmie L. Long, Jr. If my mother had not miscarried theother three children my mother had, we would have been a regular Bradybunch. My parents were not the wealthiest but the values they imparted intous were priceless. From a child my father must have known our destinies,because he began grooming us for ministry at a very early age. We didn'trealize it at the time, but the mysteries he helped to us to understand wouldbe words of wisdom to carry us throughout our lives. I can still remembergrowing up in my uncle's church El-Beth-ElDivineHolinessChurch andsinging in the choir. It is funny how as parents we really see the gifts ourchildren inherit, but we don't always know if they are destined to fulfilltheir enjoyment of them. My grandmother was the founder and overseer ofthe church and it originally started as a prayer band and grew from there.She was the matriarch of or family that held everything together on mymother's side. I was destined to be a strong woman from both my motherand my father's side of the family. I was raised Pentecostal in religiousdenomination, but trust me I would definitely learn it's not about yourreligious affiliation, but your relationship with God.

All throughout my childhood I was told by many prophets and seershow destined I would be for greatness, but I never imagined the price Iwould have to pay in order to obtain it. I always knew that I was differentfrom my peers and my family, but it wasn't until I became an adult that Iwould find out just how much I differed spiritually. Even to this day I ampeculiar to many people, because they don't understand me. I'm alwayshappy as though I'm on a high, even when I'm having a rough day. I don'tdo things the way everyone else does and I don't believe what others believe.For as long as I could remember, I have always been a leader. I've never beenone to just follow people just because it looks or sounds good. As a child myfamily knew I could sing. I would always walk around the house singingand acting like I was carrying a microphone. Music has always been myexpression of who I was and what I thought I wanted out of life. My dadwould sit us down and teach us different mysteries in the bible. At thattime we would look at him as though he was crazy. We figured none of theinformation he imparted into us would ever matter to us since we were onlychildren. As we became adults we began to understand the importanceof training up a child in the way they should go, so that when they grewolder they would not depart from their teachings. He was constantlydrilling us biblically to compete in what we called in the holiness churchY.P.I.A., which stood for "Young People in Action." I was always preparedbecause I was competitive and a very sore loser. Even to this day I hate tolose, I don't accept defeat very well. I would listen in amazement when myfather would teach us the different revelations and mystics that God hadrevealed to him. A lot of the things my father learned had been taught tohim from my grandmother Levonia Griffith and my great aunt Florence. Istill remember the weekends we would go to Sanford, FL and my brotherand I would play with my cousin Trell and they always stayed in trouble.

My grandmother, Dean Welch-Hall, also played a great part inhelping to groom us. I would watch her for hours as a child when shewould prophesy to people from far and near with such accuracy andprecision. A lot of people in this city depended on my grandmother forher gift. My mother also had a sister who had the gift as well EvangelistHarriet T. Smith, she and my grandmother had some of the most amazingprophetic gifts that you would ever want to witness in this day and time.My grandmother originally started out with a prayer band, which alsoincluded awesome women like Mother Wright, Mother Oliver, and PastorDowling. I have met lot of prophets in my time, but not many like thesewomen. I remember watching these ladies when I was smaller and thinkingto myself, "man when I grow up I want the gift of prophecy just like them."Man, if I only knew what I was asking for at the time. We always see howeasy others make their walk with God look, but we don't always see whatit took to get them there. These women would have you on the altar allnight if necessary praying with you and calling on Jesus, until you weredelivered. Churches no longer take the time to travail anymore. Now whenyou go to worship everyone puts the move of God on a time frame, andpeople are still malnutrition when they leave and no one is being delivered.I never understood how people could party all night long and never payattention to the time, but when they go to worship God they watched theclock minute by minute. God forbid if its football season, even some thepreachers cut their sermons and services short so they can get home to thegame. They even have Super Bowl at some churches now.

I remember as a child my father had multiple strokes and spentnumerous months in the hospital recovering. He couldn't walk or talk fora while. The doctors had ever declared that he would never walk again, butGod had other plans. I remember my grandmother and great aunt comingdown from Sanford many nights to help care for my dad while he was inthe hospital. I remember we would spend nights at a time out there waitingfor my dad to recover. My mother stayed by his side the whole time caringfor him and assisting him praying he would get better. We would have somuch fun at the hospital playing video games and different activities thatwe never even concerned ourselves with questioning whether he wouldrecover or not. Slowly but surely he recovered. After months of therapy andlearning to walk and talk again, my father slowly regained his strength.It must have been a turning point in his life because from there he tookGod more seriously. To see my father today, you would never even knowhe had any massive strokes. God did a divine healing in him and to thisday we are all thankful.

By the time I was nine, I began to show my leadership abilities inthe choir and many other areas of the church. I started teaching Sundayschool for the toddlers in the church. Interesting enough I never wantedto be bothered by kids younger than me, but I enjoyed teaching them.Even now as an adult I enjoy empowering younger women and helping toimpart positive things into their lives, to prevent them from making thesame mistakes I made. My grandmother made sure we knew every positionin the church from being an usher, to praying, and conducting praise andworship. My father eventually left my uncle's ministry to begin a visionof his own. Back then he was the only one who could see and believe thevision, so we continued to worship at my uncle's church. My grandmotherwas still alive, so all of my mother's relatives in Jacksonville were allaffiliated with our family church, where my uncle was Bishop LorenzoHall, Sr. was the pastor. We had some very interested times in that churchgrowing up, some for the good and some for bad, but one thing you couldalways rest assure of was a good laugh on Sunday morning. I rememberwe would sit in church and make fun of the members for hours and myuncle was always long winded so we were guaranteed to be home by twoor three pm. I watched a lot of families come and go in that church andsome even came back and left again.

By the time I was twelve, I began to have visions, but I wasn't sure ofwhat they were until my grandmother explained them to me. I was startingto think they were some kind of dejavue or something, because I wouldhave them so frequently. At times all of the cousins in my generation wouldalways gather and play church in my grandmother's yard and mimic myaunts and other members of the church, and that was our idea of fun. Oneday, my cousins Napoleon, Nita, Vanessa, and LaDale were all outsideplaying church and it was my turn to be the preacher. As I began to pretendto preach something unusual happened. The spirit of God really hit mycousinLaDale, we thought she was doing her usual pretending to shout onlythis time it was for real. Eventually, she was slain in the spirit and began toprophesy. Of course, this was the first time any of us had witnessed this,so naturally we thought something was wrong with her. We were all tooscared to get an adult, because we thought we would get whipped with apeach tree switch from my grandmother for playing with God. I ran intothe house and got my grandmother and aunt Carolyn and they said leaveher alone God is using her. It was really fun to watch then because aschildren we were silly and everything humored us. I've always been a clownby nature and never took anything serious, so with a huge grin on my face,I said "why is he using her, I was the preacher." My grandmother correctedme immediately and said you never disrupt the spirit of God in action.For the first time my cousin began to prophesy, so naturally she beganto become a part of our Sunday morning mimic. We picked at her everytime we saw her, but as she grew older her gift developed more. A coupleof months after that event we were at my grandmother's home as usualand my grandmother had gotten caught up in the spirit and sat Vanessa,LaDale, and myself down to prophesy to us. She would lie across her bedfor hours reading her bible and picking her lottery numbers. She told usall that we were called to ministry and then she looked at me and revealedthe things she saw in the spirit to me. She said "I see you traveling, singing,and preaching at a young age." Let me just say, that is not something thata twelve year old girl would like to hear. Then she told me I would haveall boys and that I would get married. Again, not something I would beinterested in hearing, especially when I was the tomboy of the crew, I waslike how come I would be the only one to marry and she gave me a lookand immediately I knew to shut up. My grandmother told the others theywould not have kids or marry anytime soon and too this day neither ofthem has ever been married and Vanessa just had her first child in 2010.It was then that I realized that I was created to worship.

I remember later that year my aunt Harriet died of breast cancer she,like my grandmother had played a major role in keeping my mom's familytogether. People would come from all over to see her to prophesy to them.Even on her death bed people were coming to the hospital trying to getreadings from her. Some people are just leaches by nature; they don't careabout you or what you're going through everything is about what you cando for them. She was so keen she would send my father to the dog trackafter she saw a number. When she would hit, before he could even getin the door good, she would say to him "I know you have my money." Iremember once my older cousin left daughter in the tub for only a splitsecond, her mother was so keen she called her on the phone and told herto go and get her baby. Every family has that favorite family member thatevery loves to be around and in my mom's family they were my aunt andmy grandmother. On my dad's side it was my grandmother, my AuntSharon, and my Uncle Sam. Every Friday night all of the adults wouldmeet at my Aunt Harriet's house to play cards, eat fish, and listen to somedown home blues. I remember the day my aunt died, like it was yesterday.It was November 15, 1989, the first time I had ever seen my father cry.Everyone was at the hospital, except my brother and I. We were at homewith my father, when we received the call from my mother, informing usshe had passed away. My mother and her sisters were always very close.My mother even quit her job to help take care of my aunt when the cancerprogressed; she did the same for her brother when he took sick as well. Myolder sister was also very close to my aunt, she went to live with her whenmy mother put her out of the house at age sixteen. After my aunt's deaththings in my mom's family begin to change.

I had my first spiritual experience of the Holy Spirit after her death,while attending her funeral. Sometimes we look at the circumstances in ourlives that we don't agree with or like, and began to automatically assume it'sfor the bad. I can truly say I understand with clarity the scripture Romans8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to them that loveGod, to them who are called according to His purpose." It was the first andlast time my grandmother would have to bury a child. You could see thedecline in my family gatherings from there. A couple of years later mygrandmother Dean Hall passed, it was June 6th, 1992. I will never forgetthe day she died, because it was a Sunday and we were getting dressed forchurch when she passed. I remember trying to run across the street to myaunt's home and passing out in the middle of the road. My crazy unclecalled the night before upsetting everyone, saying she had passed and mysister and I both took off running down the service road, only to find outhe was just scared because he saw her eyes rolling in the back of his head.We laughed about it later that night but he scared the heck out of us all.My uncle always said and did crazy stuff. He has been married so manytimes I can no longer count and he has always done crazy stuff and blamedit on the little Chinese man in his head. We often sit around and joke aboutthe crazy family we have, but they have good hearts.

Later, that year I was diagnosed with mitral valve prolapsed, whichis a leaking valve in the heart. I should have known then that somethingwas different about my destination, because illness tried to overcome meeven in my youth. I remember taking my grandmother's death very hard,I made up my mind then that I wasn't going to allow myself to be closeto anyone else to the point that I could not detach myself. Her death wasthe root of my hurt, because I couldn't understand what God was doingat that time in our lives. Why would he take her, before she could impartthings I needed into my life from a female I could trust? As I grew older Iunderstood she had to leave us or else we would have all been co-dependenton her instead of trusting in God. It was then that I came to understandthat some things are for the manifestation of God. I learned it doesn'tnecessarily take anyone putting their hands on you to impart into you,when God has truly anointed you for a purpose.

Continues...

Excerpted from On The Road 2 Recoverby Jennifer D. Long Copyright © 2011 by Jennifer D. Long. Excerpted by permission.
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